Today is April 15, 2011. It's our 35th monthsary. Though, it isn't so well when we start our day, ti ends good. <3
I was so near to start crying this morning thinking that he'd be lost forever, but, as always, he insists that THAT WILL NEVER BE GOING TO HAPPEN. He promise me, that will never be happening. All I can do is trust him with that promise.
And I have this feeling again, thinking if 'do I really love him?'. I can't answer my question. Well, I need some help, but I think no one can.
Then, early noon, 10:30 AM, my dad ask me to go to the bank and deposit the check of his officer to it's officer's account. I was getting ready. Whew, I feel sexy with my jeans and tshirt. HAHAH. I got to the bank and WHOAH! The people their were like sardines! There's a lot of people, waiting for their turn to pay their taxes, because TODAY IS THE DEADLINE. I wasn't that shock, because Filipinos are always doing things 11th hours, ALWAYS. Maybe, there are some not, but you can find them so RARELY. HAHAH.. I am a Filipino and sometimes, I do things 11th hour, too. :D hahahaha
Well, anyways, when I got there, I got a priority number and wanna know what my number is? 89! and wanna know what is the number they are callling that time? 29! hahahaha! My number is 60 away! OMG.. The guard assists me, and said I should probably sit while waiting because my number is too far away if I stand waiting. So, weehew, I sit.
Texting to him, good thing we're already okay. One thing I love about him? He can think of a way to make me smile. :) Even his jokes were eeew, corny and I don't know, he can managed to make me smile. :)
12PM, I am still waiting. tooot tooot toot. And the cut-off time of depositing checks on non-regional checks is 12PM! So, I have nothing to do but ask the guard if what will I do, he said, just tell her you're depositing a check, they will consider. WAHHA! Luckily, the teller really considered it. YEHEY! I am finally done waiting. hoho
Afternoon? All I do was facing the netbook, had a tinychat with tumblristas:
goodnight. <3 :*
- April 15, 2011

Yesterday? Nothing really happen that great.. Its just that I wrote my last will and testament.. I feel like I am dying.. :(

I am LONGING for his attention and love and time, but maybe I can't get what I want. I want to surrender but there's something in me says don't.

Maybe this is the shortest entry I'll be doing.. and ooh, my last will and testament? I'll be uploading it soon.

This is AGAIN a late entry. This is for April 14,but today's already April 15. And today is our monthsary. We're already been together for 2 years and 11 months, that's kinda long already.
And I am feeling alone now. I know there's something in tumblr that says, don't love is you're alone, love when you are ready.  But don't blame me if I am seeking for love when I am alone, maybe I am NOT SEEKING for love, I am looking for friendship, where I can tell them what I feel, I can chat with them anytime. Yes, I am looking for friendship, not for love, but I can't find any people who can be my friends.

Thank you blogger, I finally knew what am I looking for. :"(
- April 14, 2011

I went to sleep last night was, I think, already 3AM. HAHA. Because, I downloaded some piano lessons (videos), and watch Leverage Series online. Time flew fast that I hasn't thought that it's already 3AM that time.

Well, anyways, my mom & dad went to Cagayan de Oro City to fix somethings, I guess. So, we were left here in our home, we, three little sisters. :) My dad told me to finish writing those columnar, cash books and financial statements that maybe he would ask me to deliver those papers to his office. :)
They woke me up, 7AM. Exhausted, I still need to finish my work. I don't think it was worth tired, because dad would pay me a hundred for it. :D
10AM, I finished it, at last! I, then, decide to start my self-learning on piano. I choose Speak Now by Taylor Swift as a starter piece. As you know, piano uses two hands BUT I only practice one hand. HAHA. And I only learn from the start until the first chorus. :) Not bad enough for a self-teaching piano lessons. :) I used my sister's so-long-never-been-touched piano. HAHAH.
Lunch time arrived when my boyfriend told me that he has to prepare, so go. :) After an hour, he texted me that he was already going here at our home. HAHAH.. I was shocked, as in, true? He would really visit me. It's unbelievable because he has no money to pay for transportation costs, so weeeh!
My dad then called me and said I can now deliver the papers. HAHA. Bad girl because I really waited for him and really finished the movie we are watching since lunch time, The ghost writer. We leave the house, 3PM. HAHAHA..
I don't like the part of delivering the papers because I REALLY FELT TIRED WALKING BACK AND FORTH from Novo Jeans and Shirts Store and their office. HAHAH

Then, we had gone to school before we went home to see our grades. I was shocked! HAHAA, Shocked when I saw my grades, weeh! I only got one 2.0.. I hope, it'll be ONLY THE ONE.. Please Lord help me with this, I really need to get those grades! :( I was happy, though. As a celebration, I treat him a bottle of coke. HAHA. CHEAP eeh? It's because we're only poor people. HAHA
Anyways, We continue our love and laugh trip at home. :) He met chulilit, and he really likes her, she's cute!
HAHAHA.. Just tonight, we took pictures, a bunch of pictures, as a family! HAHAHA.. What a trip. :D we also recorded videos on how chulilit ate those greeny leaves and how she popo on him. HAHAHAHA

So SAD that I can't upload the videos, maybe I'll post the pictures later. I'm already sleepy ee. Goodnight people! LOVEYOU!
Today was full of kiss but lack a little on hugs, I miss hugs! Can I just hug him for a day or two? Oooh, I am still wondering when will that scene happens. <3

-April 13, 2011

Today? Went not well at first, I am not in the mood, as in totally not. My mood yesterday and this morning is almost the same. I didn't even text my boyfriend until my dad told me to register on a promo called dagdagcall on TM Network. And, so, I can't register on that promo if I don't register on a text promo, and so, I registered on Astigtxt10. It's against my will, but I think I have no choice. I don't like texting him, not in the mood. :'(

Lunch time came, still not in the mood. I, then sleep on my room, then woke up with an improved. I am happy, maybe, but not that as bad as last night and this morning.
Then, my father told me if I would go with him and my sister to the farm, well, I said yes. I get ready and prepared. I brought my netbook, and my accounting book.
On the trip going there, my sister keeps on chatting with me and we really had a great time. We arrive at the farm, and strolled around there. I sweat for just walking! HAHA. I wore my jacket and jogging pants, I don't want to be full of red spots again, caused by those shitty mosquitoes!

I also heard this story my father and his help talking about. It's about the creature, "bal-bal", in our dialect. I don't know how true it is, but quite long time before, when I, with my dad, stayed there until evening, 6 PM perhaps, I heard something. I actually don't know what is it. I asked my dad about it, he was with the father of the help. They told me it was that creature, I got scared! freakin' scared! OMG.. But, they also told me, they won't hurt people, they are just silent creatures, only be wild if anyone would hurt them. But, I still haven't seen those kind, and I never wish to see soon. HAHAH..

And, then, my sis & I strolled on the little nipa hut where the help is living and sleeping and where, also, the little animals like dogs, puppies, rabbits are living. My sister got a puppy, and actually kissing that. HAHA. And, told her if I can get a baby rabbit, and hold it. The rabbit was so cute! AHAHA.. I want to adopt it. And asked my father if I can bring it home, he then decided to bring all the baby rabbits, total of 8, to our house back at Malaybalay City. weeeh! I, then, officially adopted the baby rabbit and baptized it with the name "chulilit". HAHA.. I really took care of it..

When my sister is feeding them at home already, I want put chulilit at their little home to eat with her little sis and bros, and so I asked my sister to put it there. She holds it like murdering it, but literally not! HAHA. I yelled at her not to hold chulilit like that! It might hurt her. HAHAH.. Over protective owner?  haha..

Tonight, my dad gave me a task, a job! He wants me to wrote down all the transactions of their coop but he already computed it on the computer, and he wants just purely copy those to a columnar. It was not that hard, he said he will pay me for a hundred! weeeh.. Money! money! money! gimme money! hahha..

Before I wrote this entry, I'm already on the October 15th. weeehew.. I'm near to the end! HAHA..
Bad news is that, he gave me additional job, but no rise on pay. HAHA.. it's alright! Money Money Money!!

I should go to bed right now. My head hurts again. Good night! :)

-- April 12, 2011

-- I can't go to bed! I am watching me favorite series on AXN! Leverage! HAHAHA
-- God bless! <3

Today was ugh, I don't know..
I feel so alone, and worthless and no friends, and I felt less love.. IDK..

I was pissed off this afternoon, when my mom was trying to look for a sleeveless she's going to use to her aerobics session. [her 'coz I don't like it anyway, I don't want to go back there anymore]. Then, she asked me, I said, maybe it was in my closet, try to look at there. And then, she goes there, and murmuring where is it, and asked me again where, I don't even know what she's looking for. I think she's looking for an invisible sleeveless, she was describing it and I didn't know that kind of sleeveless. OMGis, my closet was ugh, it was like a tornado visited it. SH***T.. Then, I was pissed off, from that time, 'til now that I'am writing this.. :'(

My wardrobe was already that messy and then she make it WORST! ugh. :(

I just took a bath to cool myself down.. I spent almost half an hour there to cool off. Then, here's my boyfriend, so busy with his life. I was also pissed at him, I feel he doesn't love me anymore, I don't really know actually. Just that, I don't know. </3

I hope he'll realize someday while reading this blog that I, sometimes, felt no love in me. I have trust in him, but, I think I just need more attention.

About the aerobics thing, I don't like the atmosphere in the area where they held the session. All the people there were so SERIOUS! I hate people who are so serious. Are really they are serious doing that to lose weight? Well, don't eat for a week! and you'll be skinny for sure.. And stop being too serious, people! You will get 4 times older by that! And yeah, you will be sexy but you look older, so stop! I hate it. PERIOD!

Today was so stressful, oh, no, just tonight. I cried when a thought came into my mind that I was a friend of nobody, except him. No one is texting me, sending me a message at facebook, even a poke, there's none! Also, in tumblr, no one is really a friend there. They just reply to a post when they want SOMETHING..

I hate people doing that, yes, maybe I was useful, but that is not a good attitude! Even though they got nothing for you, you still have to say hi and hello and maybe should also asked how are they, are they doing fine and things like that. Not just that, they would just message something because they WANT SOMETHING other than anything else. Stop it. K?

I need someone to text to, like a friend and be a best friend someday and share thoughts and ideas. I want something like that, he's here but he's busy. I need someone to accompany my loneliness, because if no one will?, I feel so alone and worthless and giving myself SELF-PITY..

:'(

And, oh, there was something behind my right ear, and it really hurts. I need some help but they kinda just don't mind it. I feel like dying and you know. :'(

-have a nice night guys..

- April 11. 2011

We've gone to church today. :)
After that, HAHA, we took our lunch at Anton's Fastfood and Music Bar, located in front of the Bethel Baptist Hospital @ Sumpong, Malaybalay City, Bukidnon.
We, as a family, had a great time while we were there! We availed to their VIP room, worth PhP 1, 500.00, expensive yet so satisfying! You have unlimited access to their videoke in the room, sing as long as you want for three hours! Sing as loud as you want, you can't be heard from the fast food, where just beside the VIP Rooms. :D
HAHA, the PhP 1, 500.00 is already consumable for foods and drinks. So, you can order food and drinks for PhP 1, 500.00. :D HAHA.. The funny part is when my dad gave me San Mig Light drink.. I am used to drink Tanduay mixed to Blue Flame or Chocobum mixed & Red Horse. But, I never took San Mig Light until my dad handed me over a bottle of it. He said I should finished three bottles, and huh? THREE? The taste was not that good, I haven't been used to it 'til I finished the two bottles only. I still not used to drink it. HAHA.. And I wasn't felt drunk by that. It's so light. hehehehe..

We also ordered an ice cream, and Set A food group. :) I am so FULL! As in F-U-L-L! weeeh.. My diet was fully ruined by that lunch only.

I, then slept the time we arrived at our home. I woke up almost 6PM and then, later on, boooosh! Brown out! haha.. And it came back, I don't know. I just woke up 11:45 PM, and the electric fan and the light was open. hoho.
I want to get in the Internet but, I was sleepy so, I slept back. HAHA..

The day was great! weeeh.. I really have a great bonding with them, my family. :)

I was writing this, early in the morning of April 11, 2011. :D But, this entry was for yesterday's happening. :D

- April 10, 2011

So, today was good. <3
We washed our clothes this morning while he helped his father to put some tiles on someone's home, they're carpenters, you know? :D
He was so busy, he barely text me. He said, he will just stole a moment to grab his phone and text me. hehe.. sweet! <3
Then, he came here, to visit me. Even though it's already 6PM in the early evening, he still came. That's how he missed me much. HOHO
And then, we do cooking some sweet potatoes and put some melted sugar to it. And cuddle, laugh, kiss, watches TV and laugh, and cuddle! HAHA.. All evening, after washing plates, that's what we always do, whenever he's here. :D

He was so happy tonight, 'coz mom, who only talks to him sometimes, actually talk to her and smiled at him. HE WAS SO HAPPY. HAHA

She barely talks to him and when we're about to eat dinner, she, mom, who actually invited him to join the table! weeh. hahahaha

okay.. HAHA.. I just missed him so much! :)))

- April 09, 2011